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Think about the last time you felt a negative emotion---like stress, anger, or frustration. What was going through your mind as you were going through that negativity? Was your mind cluttered with thoughts? Or was it paralyzed, unable to think?
The next time you find yourself in the middle of a very stressful time, or you feel angry or frustrated, stop. Yes, that's right, stop. Whatever you're doing, stop and sit for one minute. While you're sitting there, completely immerse yourself in the negative emotion.
Allow that emotion to consume you. Allow yourself one minute to truly feel that emotion. Don't cheat yourself here. Take the entire minute---but only one minute---to do nothing else but feel that emotion.
When the minute is over, ask yourself, "Am I wiling to keep holding on to this negative emotion as I go through the rest of the day?"
Once you've allowed yourself to be totally immersed in the emotion and really fell it, you will be surprised to find that the emotion clears rather quickly.
If you feel you need to hold on to the emotion for a little longer, that is OK. Allow yourself another minute to feel the emotion.
When you feel you've had enough of the emotion, ask yourself if you're willing to carry that negativity with you for the rest of the day. If not, take a deep breath. As you exhale, release all that negativity with your breath.
This exercise seems simple---almost too simple. But, it is very effective. By allowing that negative emotion the space to be truly felt, you are dealing with the emotion rather than stuffing it down and trying not to feel it. You are actually taking away the power of the emotion by giving it the space and attention it needs. When you immerse yourself in the emotion, and realize that it is only emotion, it loses its control. You can clear your head and proceed with your task.
Try it. Next time you're in the middle of a negative emotion, give yourself the space to feel the emotion and see what happens. Keep a piece of paper with you that says the following:
Stop. Immerse for one minute. Do I want to keep this negativity? Breath deep, exhale, release. Move on!
This will remind you of the steps to the process. Remember; take the time you need to really immerse yourself in the emotion. Then, when you feel you've felt it enough, release it---really let go of it. You will be surprised at how quickly you can move on from a negative situation and get to what you really want to do!
清理心靈的空間
想下你較近一次感受到的消極情緒,例如壓力,憤怒或挫折。當(dāng)你處于那種消極情緒時你在想些什么?是充滿了混亂的思緒?還是陷于麻木,無法思考?
下次當(dāng)你發(fā)現(xiàn)自己處于非常緊張的狀態(tài)時,或是你感到氣憤或受挫時,停下來。是的,對,停下來。不管你在做什么,停下來坐上一分鐘。坐著的時候,讓自己完全沉浸在那種消極情緒之中。
讓那種消極情緒吞噬你,給自己一分鐘的時間去真切地體會那種情緒,不要欺騙自己。花整整一分鐘的時間 - 但只有一分鐘 - 去體會那種情緒,別的什么也不要做。
當(dāng)一分鐘結(jié)束時,問自己:"我是否想在今天余下的時間里繼續(xù)保持這種消極情緒?"
一旦你允許自己完全沉浸在那種情緒當(dāng)中并真切體會到它,你就會驚奇地發(fā)現(xiàn)那種情緒很快就消失了。
如果你覺得還需要點(diǎn)時間來保持那種情緒,沒關(guān)系,再給自己一分鐘的時間去體會它。
如果你覺得自己已經(jīng)充分體會了那種情緒,那就問自己是否愿意在今天余下的時間里繼續(xù)保持這種消極情緒。如果不愿意,那就深呼吸。呼氣的時候,把所有的消極情緒都釋放出去。
這個方法似乎很簡單 - 幾乎是太過簡單了,但卻非常有效。通過給自己空間真正體會消極情緒,你是在處理這種情緒,而不是將其壓制下去然后盡量不加理會。通過給予消極情緒所需的空間和關(guān)注,你實際上是在消解其力量。當(dāng)你沉浸在那種情緒之中,并且明白它只是一種情緒時,你就擺脫了它的控制。你可以清理頭腦并繼續(xù)做事。
你下次籠罩消極情緒時,試一下這種做法,給自己一點(diǎn)空間來體會那種情緒并看看會發(fā)生什么。隨身帶一張寫著如下字句的紙條:
停下來。沉浸一分鐘。我想保持這種消極情緒嗎?深吸氣,呼氣,放松。繼續(xù)做事!
這會提醒你該怎樣去做。記住,要花你所需要的時間去真正沉浸于那種情緒之中。然后,當(dāng)你感到自己已經(jīng)充分體會到了它。你會驚奇地發(fā)現(xiàn),你很快就能擺脫消極情緒,并開始做你真正想做的事情!
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